around the rumor-mill...

anna nicole smith: murdered. i'm calling it now. whether or not it ever comes out i'm convinced somebody killed her. and her son. it's just too strange how they both died from the same combination of drugs. and there are plenty of people who have motive.

her "family" in texas for example. (did you know her mom's name is vergie? it's what we would called fergie if she was a vegetarian. is she a vegetarian?) they were already estranged, why not complete it? kill her, kill her son they don't like, and get the money they think they deserve. not to mention attempt to get custody of the new baby and milk her life for all the mula it's worth.

or how about her first husband's son who was bitter of the fact that he didn't get daddy's inheritance? EDIT: apparently my research skills are poor and i failed to learn that this man is actually dead. he can now be ruled out as a suspect.

also, any of her daughter's claimed baby-daddies. howard k. stern (not this guy - which i learned only after anna's death), larry birkhead, zsa zsa gabor's prince of a husband, and of course, let's not leave out the bodyguard. kill anna, fight for custody (now that she's out of the picture and unable to block the tests), and use said motherless baby to get money, fame, and other things rich people want.

and what about all those people suing trimspa? sue the spokeswoman, then kill her. makes the legal process smoother without a big name, wealthy woman on the company's side.

anyway, it wasn't suicide or an accident or due to a bout with the flu. somebody poisoned her. that's my theory and i'm sticking to it.

britney spears: nervous breakdown? head lice? publicity stunt? rehab requirement? skinhead? take your pick, they are probably all right. her website is currently "under construction" and will return soon with a new look, just like her. there has been no "official statement" on her behalf.

i think her team is just waiting for some talk-show host/news anchor/radio dj/random dude on the street to think up the best reason. then they are going to cook it up and run with it. why? because even britney doesn't know why she did it. which i find totally acceptable. we all do things we really can't explain; things that just seem like a good idea at the time. this act just happened to be a poor choice on behalf of somebody who's life is constantly in the public eye.

bill o'reilly seems to think she's on the path to being the next anna: “everything this woman is doing is working against the woman, there is nothing that she’s doing right now that is helping her...her audience is gone, she could end up dead just like ms. smith." other parallels? jacked up marriage history. blonde hair (most of the time). custody battles. severe public scrutiny throughout most of her career. battles with drugs & drinking.

and bill is not the only one thinking along these lines. example one. here's another. and then there's my favorite, that diagnoses britney with "anna nicole syndrome." that takes a level of class that very few gossip columnists can stoop too.

of course, i can't forget to mention that while britany's stunt might be a sign of things to come (as foretold by anna nicole), donald trump might also embrace the new look. maybe spears is just being a trend-setter?